Saturday, September 20, 2014

Long Slow Decline

The weather is getting colder again. The sun has been quietly slipping away from long evenings and is later to rise in the mornings; a sleepy thing still full of summer's yellow heat but none of the summer's vitality. The leaves won't be green for much longer. The nights are cool, bordering on cold, and the mornings are dewy and crisp. Two weeks ago some of the stores got out their Christmas stock and pumpkin spice creamer and put them out to sell.

Many people love this time of year. I try, but as someone who suffers from Seasonal Affective Disorder (and hates being cold so intensely) there is something final and terrible about fall. It's hard to enjoy crisp autumn mornings when you're focusing on the next 4-6 months of frozen toes, sinus infections and cabin fever. And when one works retail (as I do) the spectacle of Christmas merchandise in September is bone-chilling indeed. I used to at least attempt to enjoy the holiday season and I think last year I put the tree up more out of a sense of obligation than any desire to be festive and jolly. I felt like I had to have at least one facebook photo of myself or the cats near the tree, so I could prove to everybody else (and maybe convince myself) that I wasn't suffocating under the weight of winter cold and early darkness and mindless holiday consumerism.

Look at me. Moping inside on a 78* fall day - and a Saturday off, to boot! - , prophesying doom and gloom for the months to come.

Something needs to change.

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