Monday, August 29, 2005

Baby

A girl I know has given birth to a baby boy. She named him Daniel. She is 19, unmarried, without a good job last I heard, and in college. I'm happy for her, because a birth is always a wonderful occasion; at the same time I am disappointed. I never thought that she would become a statistic: another unwed teenage mother.

You know, I'd love to be a mother. It's an important goal of mine - but not now. I know better than to risk my entire future and that of my child. I'm in college. I work (if I get the job) part time. I have classes to take and student teaching to do. I have grad school ahead of me. There is no sensible way for me to have a child right now without giving up my education and struggling to make a living. My whole life is ahead of me.

It always makes me wonder what goes through these girls' heads: why they're making decisions that will put another obstacle on the road to success. For that matter, what do they want out of life? Everyone should have a goal... and they don't seem to have very high ones. I guess it's just up to each person on his or her own to decide what's best and what will make them happy. I just wish that they wouldn't put themselves on the track to welfare so early in life.

That was the CliffNotes(tm) version of a rant I should probably elaborate on, but don't want to. My brain is overrun by various times and dates I'm supposed to remember. I already have a few assignments, and it's only the first day of classes.

I've had lots to do and think about lately and it looks as though my busy semester is going to get busier yet. KidsRead Tutoring is Monday nights, I'm ushering for six shows in the next two semesters, I may write for the campus newspaper again, TOST (the theatre group) is on my list, weekends are time to swordfight with my LARP group... the list goes on. I'm hoping to add a job to it, too. It looks overwhelming when I stop to think about it, and then I stop thinking and keep piling things on. The way I see it, I have three more years to do as much as humanly possible to make my resume look good and I plan to dive in headfirst.

Here's hoping the semester (indeed, the year) goes spectacularly. :)

3 comments:

  1. you didn't have to drive to college, you jerk. =P

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  2. yeah, ya could have saved yourself 75 bucks for parking, hundreds of bucks in gas, not to mention ya took the car SHE could have been driving! :P

    Who's the 'lucky' mama? from 'here', or 'there'? A very, very difficult situation... and where is 'dada'? hanging out and helping out? or got his piece and split? IMHO, there is no choice with a child - the child comes first - school, job, personal life: it all gets set aside for the first 10 years or so when you become a parent; either that, or you shouldn't become one. Children need a mom, and a dad, and need them 'there'; not off chasing their own dreams at the expense of the relationship of their child(ren). There's far more to it than I can put here. It's just a 'knowing', a big picture observation with thousands of tiny arrows pointing to the same place that few seem to see, because they are intent on looking their own way. I'm sure you can come up with your own observed examples.

    <3

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